Beautiful and Comforting Words.

Today I got a really great Facebook message from one of my friends that I grew up with. Our dads are the best of friends and have worked together for years. Jessica is older than me and I just looked up to her so much and thought she was way cool...even if we didn't see each other very much.

I realized today how much more "cool" of a girl she has become. She is an amazing woman of courage. What a great example of an incredible mother of faith who has a child that has been dealt a difficult hand. I am so impressed with her and her husband's attitude and strength through a very hard time.

I know that my health has not been a walk in the park throughout my life and it has been really hard and challenging. But I can barely imagine watching my child go through it. It gives me so much respect for parents like her, my parents included.

This is her baby Aili:

Poor little thing has been through so much with her heart and open heart surgery. I was in tears as I caught up and read her entire blog today about her experiences.

After my post yesterday explaining how nervous I was for recovery and how much I didn't want a big scar afterwards, Jessica sent me this message and I just bawled. It made me feel a lot of comfort and peace and meant so much to me. Sheesh, I am crying so hard right now just thinking about it. Her message said:

Hey Chelsea,


I am so sorry to hear that you will most likely be having open heart surgery. As much as that sucks, it will be great to have your heart fixed! You mentioned that you aren't too thrilled about having a massive scar down your chest...seriously who would be? No one wants that! I just wanted to share a blog post I did a little while back about my baby's scar from open heart surgery. Hopefully the quote I share in it will give you strength and peace like it did for me.
Jessica


Good luck with everything! We will be praying for you! 

Then to quote her blog:

"My birthday was just a couple days before we left to go to California, I asked for a Kindle, so I could read while we were there in the hospital. I got my Kindle. The first book I bought was "Heaven is Here" by Stephanie Nielson from the blog Nie Nie Dialogues. Most of you are probably familiar with her and her blog. She was in a plane crash and was burned severely. This book is about her story of getting through that experience. It's amazing, I highly recommend it. I read it within the first couple days of being in California, before Aili had her surgery.

There was one passage in the book that really stood out to me. It's exactly what I needed to hear/read. Stephanie met with Elder Holland (a general authority for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints). She wrote about a conversation they had:

"As we talked he told me to be proud of my scars. 'We look for Christ's scars because they are evidence of what He did for us. They'll be the first things He shows us when we see Him again. Your scars tell a story too. Although they may not make you feel attractive, they are a witness of a miracle, that God blessed you to live, and that you have accomplished very difficult things.'"

How true is that for Stephanie, but also for everyone who has scars, like my sweet, beautiful baby. That quote brought me such peace, because that is exactly what that her scar is, witness of a miracle, an AMAZING miracle, and it totally shows the really hard things she has/will accomplish at such a young age. God blessed her to live! What a wonderful blessing!

My baby is amazing, when she is old enough I will share that quote with her, and I will always teach her to be proud of her scar, and I hope she is. She is truly the most beautiful baby girl in the whole world, and because of her I'm becoming a stronger, and better person."

I just loved this so much. It gave me so much hope and strength because sometimes I felt less-than because of all of the surgeries and problems I have had to face. If I am going to be honest, I have even wondered how even just in dating and meeting people how someone will be able to see past my medical history. It has been lengthy and this will be my 10th surgery and one of many hospital stays. I have been embarrassed and sometimes self-conscious about what kinds of problems I have had. Now that one of my scars will be so visible I felt like, "oh great, now this will always be a topic of conversation." 

But this quote helps me to remember that many people have things much worse than I can even imagine. That I have been able to overcome many of the issues I have personally been dealt. To not dwell on the past. That more importantly, our Savior has overcome everything, including the pain and emotional roller coaster I have been through. The miracle of modern medicine. That I have an amazing mother and father who have been through so much right along with me to help me get better.

Thank you Jessica for reminding me of this.

Her blog is found HERE if you want to read more...it really is amazing.