Saturday, June 6, 2009

Events that can happen in 16 hours at an old folks home.

All names have been changed*

 Sitch number 1:
Today Yolanda came up to me and jokingly said,
"Hey you're a little chicken sh%$. Hahahah! Oh stinky I'm kidding."
"Oh Yolanda I know you are."
"Good, cuz I love ya honey. In fact you're the only mormon I like."
(I'm pretty sure she IS mormon she just forgot)

Sitch number 2
Bernille walks out and throws a VHS at me.
"Bernille what is this for?"
"Take it away right now."
"What's wrong with it darlin'"
"It's too sexy, I don't want to watch it!"

Sitch number 3
Teresa who is pretty far gone with dementia and laughs and cries almost simultaneously,
says to me in her very most mom voice and with a very serious face,
"Now honey, I love ya, but you don't come in here and just pull my pants down like you do."
"Alright sweetheart I will try."
"Good, because I am so tired of you comin' in and taking my binders,
but you know I just love ya honey."

Sitch number four:
I went in to check on Lamar's brief to see if he had wet.
I pulled it down a little to check and he yells:
"Help! Help! You're hurtin' me!"
"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to."
"Well, yeah, you'll never understand because you've never felt it
and you women don't have one of those down there!"

Oh man it was sure a long day. I won't do another double shift for a long time.
It was fun though, and I had a lot of good laughs like usual. 


Bark said...

Hahaha. NEVER leave that place.

rebecca said...

i'm glad you're still amazing. that makes me happy. and amazed.

Meg said...

Thanks for the good laugh! Have you heard of Reader's Digest all in a days work.. I think you should submit the you woman don't have one of those down there stories.. it's worth $500 if the choose it!