Saturday, May 21, 2011

Who knows? I sure don't.

I have to be one of the most antsy human beings on the planet.

I know it probably drives my parents insane and whoever I take to be my lofly wedded will probably want to kill me too. It is a blessing and a curse... I know I get a lot done because of it and it also generally helps me make good choices because I am so worried about changing my eternal outcome. 

Honestly I have calmed down a lot, but this business of putting me down in bed and rendering me completely useless for 6 going on 7 months is enough to drive me over the edge. Now that I am feeling better I am in limbo of knowing what to do....and that my friends in a lot of ways is worse than being down sick in bed and knowing you can't do anything. Now comes the stress of trying to figure out what is next and what I should do.

I don't really know how to explain it. It is this need to get going...get in gear. Go to school, get a job, date, work out, travel, do student government, get to the temple, scrapbook my whole my life, finish my mission, read every book, DO EVERYTHING. 

Where do I go to school? How do I pay for it? Do I get a job? WAIT. Slow down Chels....I don't even feel well enough to do a lot of that! Answer...antsy. Slow down. Get better first. Sheesh.

Everyone and their dog will tell me not to worry about it....but I just can't help it. I just came that way and I don't have any idea what to do. I do however know what degree I want and what I want to do in my that is a step in the right direction, but I can't stand limbo.

You know what else feels confusing? The fact that Oprah only has three shows left.

I just hate it, hate that she is ending. Love the Oprah queen and love the show...I will miss my 4:00 regular that I have watched since I was in like 6th grade. Although I am super excited to see her last three know they are gonna be bomb. Still bummed I lost the contest to snag 4 tickets! One day I will post the HILARIOUS outtakes of that stupid video. I absolutely HATED doing that entry...if I didn't think I even had a stitch of a chance because only 200 people entered you wouldn't have caught me dead doing that. Well, it was worth a shot.